I'm too scared to go to the Easter Show

Laugh it up clowns

I used to love the Easter Show when I was little. The best part was when the special newspaper supplement came out showcasing all the different showbags you could buy. My sisters and I would spend hours looking at that thing discussing the pros and cons of different bags and what would get us the most stuff with the number of bags we were allowed to get (Bertie Beetle hands down always a winner). I also enjoyed seeing the animals, fruit displays, food and general vibe of it all - but mostly it was about the bags.

The last time I went to the show though was probably 20 years ago as a teenager. And it wasn't that fun. I went with one of my sisters and after fighting our way there on the train with the hoards of people, we stupidly tried to get money out at the venue but the ATMs were all bust and we had something like $20 between us to buy food and bags - which even back then was a complete joke. Disaster.

And now, even though I have two small ones myself, I haven't been since. I just can't face it! The crowds, the expense, the hassle, and with two children to lug around - it's not appealing at all. I hear others talk about it, and even those who say the kids love it admit it's a mission. In recent years I've sometimes entertained the notion by bringing it up with my husband, but if you thought I wasn't keen, well in no way, shape or form is he up for the challenge. The closest I've come is getting a friend to buy me some showbags.

It's such a shame though. I wish it was easier to go because I'm sure I would go back and let my boys soak up the Easter fun. But sorry, I think I'll just stick to the good old Easter Bunny visit instead. Luckily the children don't know what they're missing out on, yet...

Do you go to the Easter Show?

Photo credit: The Thud

8 things I've learned since becoming a SCHOOL mum

I ain't afraid of no school!

Around two and a half years ago when my youngest was not long walking, I wrote a post about the surprising things I learned since becoming a mum that no one had ever told me about (check it out here). My eldest has now just started school, and once again I've found my eyes have been opened.

I'm only a month or so in, but here are a few things I've already learned since becoming a SCHOOL mum...

1. School shoes are f#*$ing expensive
I didn't think they should be super cheap (at least not ones from a proper kids' shoe store), but $124.95?? Somebody somewhere is laughing their head off while they count their bags of cash. Plus the magic shoes are already scuffed and looking ratty - which to be fair was to be expected I guess. Next time I'm going Target or Aldi shoes - how different can they really be? They're all black and look the same. Kindergarten kids are certainly not comparing brands with their friends, they don't even know what day of the week it is!  

2. School bells aren't what they're used to be
Forget the boring old bell. Our local school cranks out music to signify the start of the day - and awesome tunes at that! For the first few weeks it was the theme from Ghostbusters (!!) and now it's We are the champions by Queen (both sans lyrics). I think some people were confused though as now they've starting ringing a bell after the music, but seriously how cool is it? Most awesome school ever? Ah yes! I can't wait to hear what the next track is. 
 
3. Everyone knows you
I knew we would get to know lots of new parents from the school but already it's insane. We live just down the street and now I literally can't walk more than a few metres without seeing another mum,  dad or teacher who knows me. Gone are the days of ducking up to shops in trackies!

4. There is so much to worry about
I'm really trying not to get carried away with this, but it's pretty hard not to worry about how your little one is doing at school - especially when you chat to other parents and realise their child seems more advanced or you have the teacher telling you they're refusing to do tasks in the class and being difficult, so you know they might fall behind. And then there's the worry about whether they're playing with anyone or being bullied. It's nice to be concerned and involved with your child at school, but we need to take away the microscope and let the teachers do their thing I reckon. It's Kindergarten for crying out loud! So I've decided to let this one go a bit until I have serious things to worry about. I only started worrying I think after speaking to other parents.
 
5. School rules are really strict
You can't play on the play equipment before school, or be in the wrong area of the school grounds. You can't play if you forget your hat. You can't even volunteer to read in your child's class or help out at the tuckshop if you don't have a Working with Children check. The list goes on...I could be wrong, but I don't remember school policies being so strict in my day - especially for primary school. 

6. Food restrictions ahoy
Following on from above - everyone knows you can't let one solitary nut into a school or daycare nowadays, but did you know you can't even bring cupcakes in for your child's class when it's their birthday? That is, unless they happen to be egg-free (and who makes egg-free cupcakes?). Apparently eggs are off limits now. And so is sharing food. And I thought working out what to put in their lunchbox and what they will actually eat for their early morning fruit/vegie break snack was hard enough!

7. School is high tech
Tablets and computers at school were to be expected, as was email for communicating to parents; but there's also a smartphone app where they release newsletters and alerts, plus other stuff like online log-ins for maths homework. In Kindergarten! Even ordering at the canteen has to be done online prior. Well I guess it is the digital age...

8. Weekdays are now soooo short
I had been warned a bit about this, but didn't envisage it to be so true. After drop-off once I've done some house chores, or gone to an appointment, there is barely time to do a bit of work before it's time to go for pick-up. Luckily I can work from home but so many others can't. If it wasn't for before and after school care, there is no way that working parents could function properly. And then of course once you get home, there's homework, dinner and more chores to be done. By the time everyone's in bed you're exhausted, and then before you know it it's morning mayhem once again.

Oh well, only another 19 years to go! (with another one on the way, I just worked out I won't be done with school until 2035). Imagine what craziness will go on between now and then?

What things have you discovered since becoming a school parent?
 
Image credit: CaN Trust

Hanging jacket trend - your time is up

Can you move your arms? Nope, me neither.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Last year when I went to Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week in Sydney I was blown away by many sights - i.e. the insanely skeletal models too shocking to look at and the outrageous whacked out outfits that even the local loco bin lady wouldn't wear. But the thing that got me the most was the staggering amount of people all wearing their jackets ON their shoulders.

You know, so not actually with their arms through the sleeves like normal people, but instead hanging precariously on their shoulders ready to fall at the slightest sneeze. Seriously almost every single person, regardless of age or gender, was doing it. And looking oh so smug about it too. 

I knew previously this was a thing, mostly done by celebrities and those in fashion (e.g. Anna Wintour and Victoria Beckham), but to see so many people in one place doing it, and most of them wannabe nobodies? Well just utter craziness.

"Hey everybody, I know fashion! Check out my jacket! See how it hangs? I'm a coathanger, woo!"

And now as we're smack bang in the middle of MBFW again, I'm here to tell you that much to my dismay and disbelief, this trend is STILL HERE.

Recently Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson made an awesome surprise appearance at Valentino's show at Paris Fashion Week to promote the much anticipated Zoolander 2 film. They were in character as spoof male models, Derek and Hansel, and they were wearing - yep you guessed it - jackets hanging over their shoulders. Like so:

Look mum - no arms!

There is a reason they chose this attire people, it looks bloody ridiculous! Yes fashionistas, you are being mocked.

I seriously don't understand why anyone would choose to wear their jacket this way. Not only does it look weird (where are my arms?!), it is hugely impractical. You can't wear a handbag with a strap, and you can barely move your arms or upper body meaning you can't greet people properly or pick up things off the ground.

In my opinion the only time a jacket should be worn this way, is if it's been put there by someone else to keep you warm - such as your boyfriend on a cold walk home, or the old lady at the scene of accident. No other ocassions please!

Is it, is it? Yes it's about to slip off - act casual.

In years to come people are going to look back at photos of the hanging jacket trend, laugh their arses off and say "What were we thinking?" Kind of like, I dunno, hypercolour hotpants?! (Hey I was only 13 at the time, give me a break).

Stay away wind, I'm rocking this look right now.

So just how long is this going to be a thing? Someone needs to try something new, like wrapping a cardigan around their neck like a scarf or wearing gloves as a decorative necklace.

Perhaps the fashion world should start taking their cues from Derek and Hansel? I did in fact see something on the runway today that resembled a giant garbage bag, so you just never know.

  
Photo credits: cocafab; Getty Images; Splash; Details